Tree, Leaf and Wind Story - Part II

Leaf



During Pre-U days, I like to collect leaves.



Why?



Because I felt that for a leaf to leave the tree she has been relying on for so long it takes a lot of courage.



During the 3 years of Pre-U I was on very close terms with a guy. Not BGR kind but as buddy kind. But when he had his 1st girlfriend, I learnt a feeling I never should have learnt - Jealousy.



The sourness in the heart can't be described by using a lemon. It's like 100 rotten sour lemons. Sourness to the extreme limit. They were only together for 2 months. When they broke up, I hide my strong sense of happiness. But after a month, he got together with another girl. I like him & I know he like me.



But why won't he pursue me?



Since he loves me why he doesn't want to make the first move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my heart would hurt. Time after time, my heart was hurt. I begin to suspect that this is a one sided love. If he doesn’t like he, why does he treat me so well. It's beyond what you will normally do for a friend.



Liking a person is very heart wrenching.

I can know his likes, his habits. But his feelings towards me I can never figure out. You can't expect me a gal to ask him right? Despite that, I still want to be by his side. Care for him, accompany him, love him. Hoping that one fine day, he will come & love me. It's like waiting for his phone call every night, wanting him to send me sms.



I know that no matter how busy he is, he will make time for me. Because of this, I waited for him. The 3 years were the hardest to go through & I really want to give up. Sometimes, I wonder should I continue waiting. The pain and hurt, the dilemma accompany me for 3 years.



Till the end of my 3rd year, a 2nd year junior begins to go after me.

Everyday he pursuit me relentlessly.



From outright rejection to a point in time when I felt that I'm willing to let him have a small footing in my heart.



He's like a warm & gentle wind, trying to blow a leaf away from the tree.

In the end, I realized that I didn't want to give this wind a small footing in my heart. I know this wind will bring this badly battered leave far away & better land.

Finally I left tree, but the tree only smile & didn't ask me to stay.



Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or

because Tree didn't ask her to stay??